Counselor's Corner Tips of the month
August 2022
Welcome BES families, a new school year is beginning! School bells ring--and so do early-morning alarm clocks. Below are some simple tips to get your family ready for a new school year.
Preparing you child for going back to school
Kids bring so many emotions to the first week of school: excitement and fear, wonder and worry. So when something goes wrong — from someone mispronouncing their name to not understanding the directions, from missing home to dropping their lunch on the floor — it can feel overwhelming.
Here are four ways you can help kids navigate heading back to school.
1. Talk about what to expect in advance.
Talk to your child about what school will look like in simple, practical terms. What are the names of their teachers? What will the morning routine at home look like? What will they need to put in their backpack each day? How will they get to school? What will they eat for lunch? How will they get home?
2. Prepare for big emotions.
It takes a lot of energy to adjust to a new routine and get to know new teachers and classmates. Those after school tantrums are normal and don’t mean they are having a terrible time at school!
Kids often hold in their emotions during the day. After all, you’ve spent years helping them develop strategies to manage their behavior and work well in groups. But undoubtedly at least one thing happens every day that makes them feel worried, sad, or confused. Those feelings often come spilling out in the safety of home. Create a predictable after school routine, including a snack and some downtime. And when your child does have a meltdown, stay close and stay calm. The storm will pass, and then we can help them work through the emotions behind it.
3. Express your confidence in your child.
Children read our emotions for cues about how they should react. If we express our confidence in them, they will pick up on this.
When something goes wrong, you can also use it as an opportunity to express your confidence in them:
- Thanks for telling me what happened. We will figure this out together.
- Wow, that sounds like a tough situation at recess. You did the right thing to tell your teacher.
- I know you were really nervous about ____, but you did it.
- Learning something new can be so frustrating. Keep working at it. That’s perseverance.
4. Reach out to the teacher.
The parent-teacher relationship is so key to helping kids thrive. If you notice your child struggling academically, socially, or emotionally, reach out to your child’s teacher. If you have questions about the classroom or your child’s progress, reach out! You do not need to wait for the first parent-teacher conference to make contact.
Finally, it’s totally normal if you as the parent are having anxiety about the start of a new year. We are all working so hard to take care of our kids that we sometimes need a reminder to take care of our own needs, too. As Dr. Nadine Burke Harris, California’s Surgeon General and a pediatrician, told me, “Our emotional wellbeing is the most important ingredient for our children's emotional well-being. Self-care is not selfish.”
--Excerpt from “How to Handle a tough First Day of School” by Deborah Farmer Kris
Welcome BES families, a new school year is beginning! School bells ring--and so do early-morning alarm clocks. Below are some simple tips to get your family ready for a new school year.
Preparing you child for going back to school
Kids bring so many emotions to the first week of school: excitement and fear, wonder and worry. So when something goes wrong — from someone mispronouncing their name to not understanding the directions, from missing home to dropping their lunch on the floor — it can feel overwhelming.
Here are four ways you can help kids navigate heading back to school.
1. Talk about what to expect in advance.
Talk to your child about what school will look like in simple, practical terms. What are the names of their teachers? What will the morning routine at home look like? What will they need to put in their backpack each day? How will they get to school? What will they eat for lunch? How will they get home?
2. Prepare for big emotions.
It takes a lot of energy to adjust to a new routine and get to know new teachers and classmates. Those after school tantrums are normal and don’t mean they are having a terrible time at school!
Kids often hold in their emotions during the day. After all, you’ve spent years helping them develop strategies to manage their behavior and work well in groups. But undoubtedly at least one thing happens every day that makes them feel worried, sad, or confused. Those feelings often come spilling out in the safety of home. Create a predictable after school routine, including a snack and some downtime. And when your child does have a meltdown, stay close and stay calm. The storm will pass, and then we can help them work through the emotions behind it.
3. Express your confidence in your child.
Children read our emotions for cues about how they should react. If we express our confidence in them, they will pick up on this.
When something goes wrong, you can also use it as an opportunity to express your confidence in them:
- Thanks for telling me what happened. We will figure this out together.
- Wow, that sounds like a tough situation at recess. You did the right thing to tell your teacher.
- I know you were really nervous about ____, but you did it.
- Learning something new can be so frustrating. Keep working at it. That’s perseverance.
4. Reach out to the teacher.
The parent-teacher relationship is so key to helping kids thrive. If you notice your child struggling academically, socially, or emotionally, reach out to your child’s teacher. If you have questions about the classroom or your child’s progress, reach out! You do not need to wait for the first parent-teacher conference to make contact.
Finally, it’s totally normal if you as the parent are having anxiety about the start of a new year. We are all working so hard to take care of our kids that we sometimes need a reminder to take care of our own needs, too. As Dr. Nadine Burke Harris, California’s Surgeon General and a pediatrician, told me, “Our emotional wellbeing is the most important ingredient for our children's emotional well-being. Self-care is not selfish.”
--Excerpt from “How to Handle a tough First Day of School” by Deborah Farmer Kris
